Soccer

The Simpsons figured it out:



And really, it's not that I hate soccer. I even tried to get into the big US vs England match on Saturday, but holy shit that sucked. It was like watching 10-year-olds play in the 2nd half, and after all that hype it ends in a tie? I'm sorry, but ties are garbage. It's not a moral victory, ok? It's a little bit better than a loss, but that's it.

Seriously, how can you have such a huge, momentous sporting event, something so big it only happens every 4 years, and after you play for 90 minutes, both teams just say, "ok, that was fun" and it's over. LAME. Sports that (regularly) end in ties are a ripoff, and an abomination. I'm assuming in later rounds it goes to penalty kicks or something, but it's soccer, so maybe not. Maybe they just shake hands and wish each other well.

I think they should go to some kind of dueling after regulation is up. Goalie vs Goalie, Striker vs Striker, etc...until it's coach vs coach. I think the US Coach could kill a man with his bare hands. England's coach? His name is Fabio. You decide.